For the past year, I have been considering where my life is headed. And for the past year, I’ve come up with nothing. And for a person like me, who is always making plans and three steps ahead of everyone else, that has been very difficult. However, I’ve been learning something about patience.
|Me on my last birthday… 23!|
When I was a kid, I loved my birthday. I still do, but not to the extent that I did as a child. I couldn’t wait for it. I wanted to know what presents I would get, if/ where I would have a party, which friends I would invite. It was the highlight of my year. But the waiting, oh the waiting! It was excruciating, counting down the days… 365, 364, 363…
I think that’s how I feel now, but on a grander scale. Like I know that something great is coming but I have to wait and wait and wait until it gets here. People tell me, “That’s what your early 20s are all about” and “One day when you [insert significant event here, i.e. start/ finish grad school, get married, have kids, etc.] that will all change.” It’s frustrating, I’m tired of waiting. Especially when I’m not really sure what I’m waiting for!
So I found it quite interesting as I was going through my devotions this morning and I stumbled upon a psalm that I’ve read many times. But I think I might have always skipped over the end of it…
“Wait upon the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait upon the Lord.” Psalm 27:14
I’ve never been one to equate strength and patience, but in the season of life that I’ve been in, I’ve found that it takes amazing strength to step back and wait for instruction rather than to charge into action. I’m pretty sure that lesson alone has saved me from mountains of unknown heartache and stress.
But I’m still not a fan of waiting. And there are 263 days left until my birthday.